The seventeeth lojong slogan teaches us to “practice the five strengths, the condensed heart instructions.” The first strength is determination, and the second is familiarization.
In other word, it’s our habits.
We know our day runs by our habits. If we want to quit a habit, experts tell us the best way to do this is by creating the same kind of ritual and routine and simply swap out the “bad” thing with a good thing. (The most practical step by step guide to changing habits I’ve read is Atomic Habits.) And if we want things to become easier for us, the absolute best way to do that is through familiarization. We make this heart longing familiar to us, so it becomes like breathing.
It’s true for limiting your caffeine intake, setting limits on your social media time, or cultivating a more compassionate life. It’s all just habits.
Every martial arts student learns forms- a sequence of fundamental movements like blocks, strikes, and kicks. We learn these forms and perform them to earn our belts. Every form feels awkward when you learn them. Over time, though, with practice, you start to move past thinking about the form and simply do them. You find a flow. I love that feeling so much, when I find myself not doing a form but living a form. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it feels like everything has aligned. It’s a sense that my knowing is not just in my mind, but in my heart, soul, and body, too.
Familiarization helps us support the flow of our hearts so they become aligned with our whole selves. And the deceptive little back door of transformation for this is simply practice, habit, repetition, muscle memory.
Consider the beauty of someone who has been doing martial arts for years. They glide. It looks effortless. And then as a newbie, you try that same kick or punch or form, and you realize, DEAR GOD, this feels impossible!
That’s the power of familiarization. What once felt impossible, over time, begins to feel natural, easy, effortless even.
So, what area of your life is calling for familiarization right now? What kind of habit can best support the callings of your heart?
